Journey to a Gracious Woman

 This has taken some time to really ponder. But it finally hit me on what I could call it.  I’m not crippled by fear, even though at times it plagues me. I am not taken over by money and stuff, I’m not dependant on others approval of me or envy or pride.

My stronghold is…me. I believe the Bible has a term for this disease. It’s called selfishness.

Many people might be surprised by this because on the outside it doesn’t look that bad. But it’s not the outside that matters…it’s the heart. I struggle day in and day out with setting myself aside for other’s. The sad thing is, when I do, it is SO rewarding and I love it.  But it seems my days are set up with temptations knocking on every door I run into, to distract me from being the wife and mother God wants me to be.

So, how would my life look without this stronghold…oh my…it would be bliss! I would have a smooth running house, my children would rarely lack attention, my husband would rarely need to ask me for a thing because I [already] know his needs, but without me in the way they would all be done better.

I’m not looking for perfection. But there are many things that would go much smoother if I thought of other’s first. I would spend more time with Jesus in the wee hours of the morning if I died to flesh; if I put myself aside. I would not care if things were comfortable for me.  I would not worry so much about my needs…I would rely more on God to take care of them. He knows what I need better then I do. I could trust Him more.

I’m really looking forward to tackling this crippling stronghold and finding the steps I need to take to learn to die to flesh more…daily. Even if it starts with baby steps (which it probably should).

To be challenged in your life and your walk with Jesus, visit Cafe’ Chat to join in on this discussion. But before you do, you must go with the expectancy of change. Do not take this lightly. Kim, the wonderful woman who puts this together every week, she may not be in your city or in your church, and you may never meet her, but her heart is poured out right here, out in the open for all of us to see. This is the heart of Jesus. He wants us to confront these strongholds head on so that we can be free when we serve Him. Imagine the possibilities! Imagine how He could use us to change lives! To bring glory to Him! But He can only open the door. We have to be the one to walk through. We are not walking alone…so let’s take the first step.

This week, I went in search of a blueberry muffin recipe. I have tried several and although the ones I’ve made are tasty, I still felt guilty eating them, as they were high in sugar.

I decided this week to give Susanne @ Hillbilly Housewife a visit. I surfed through her bread recipes and found her recipe for blueberry muffins.  Let me tell you, this is exactly what I was hunting for. I needed something that required little to no sugar, since we were running low.  Anyways, check out her recipe because they are simple, frugal, healthy, and tasty.

Frugal tip: Do you like berries (strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, blackberries, etc) but they aren’t real nice on your budget? Even the frozen ones?  Trust me, I’ve been there. But I learned a neat trick this week. It was kind of a “duh-moment”. Buy the berries when they are on a great sale, and buy several containers. Or, buy them from a bulk store, such as Costco or Sam’s Club. They are cheaper in bulk. When you get them home, put them in a freezer bag or container and freeze them yourself! They won’t stick together (like I orginally thought they would) and you can use them as needed, without the worry they will go bad!  This is cheaper then buying them frozen, as long as you grab them on a great sale or in bulk. Personally, I think they taste better, too, because they are more fresh.

Hint: Before freezing strawberries, cut the green stems off.

Visit Biblical Womanhood for more frugal tips!

Isn’t it funny how doing something like grocery shopping with 4 kids in tow, ages 6, 3, 2, and 7 months, grocery list in hand and a budget in mind can make you feel like you’ve just conquered the world?

That’s what I just did and boy does it feel great, ha ha! I did go $3 over budget, BUT, I saved 33% off my bill! Woo hoo!

I am really liking this menu planning stuff! Check out these sites I’ve stumbled across. Although, Hillbilly Housewife I’ve been visiting for a while.

• $5 Dinners
• Mommy Snacks
• Simply Frugal
• Hillbilly Housewife

It seems there are several sharing links and I was thinking along the same lines. Resources are a wonderful thing to have! But, I have so many links, I wouldn’t know where to start! I think I will share with you 13 of my favorite blogs. I encourage you to visit them! They are inspiring, funny, challenging, encouraging, creative, simple, and everything in between!

1. Amy Bayliss
2. Cuddles on the Couch
3. Like a Warm Cup of Coffee
4. Peaceful Island Mother
5. Totally Tots
6. Homesteaders Heart
7. Large Family Mothering
8. At the Well…In Pursuit of Titus 2
9. Preschoolers and Peace
10. Biblical Womanhood
11. No Ordinary Moments
12. More Than Words
13. $5 Dinners

Enjoy!

For more Thursday 13’s, visit Happy to Be At Home!

This is for all you homechooling moms out there. You don’t want to miss this!

Heart of the Matter Online is having an Organized Home School Carnival. Note their little button there on the right bar. To find out all the details on this, I encourage you to click the button. I know this is what I’ll be doing, right here on this blog, for the next 8 weeks! Then, Wednesdays will officially become my times to blog about all things “home school”.

This part of the series may have been better served at the end, after going through each sphere of managing a household. But, maybe not. Managing our time is a gigantic part of managing the home, and it may require a few hits to get the point across. Rather then doing one long post about it, I’d rather break it up into several nuggets.

The one thing I have found that has worked very well for me, is using a day timer. What this is, is a daily planning page that maps out my entire day, to the hour, if needed. I have tried a couple, and so far the one I like the most comes from simplemom.net. They call it a Daily Docket and allow you to download and print it out for free. They also have this one.

I see time a little like money: you have to tell it where to go, otherwise it will just disappear. Sitting idle much of my day isn’t going to keep my house in order. I must break my day into a system and stick to it. I must do things for a specified allotment of time and then move on.

If I spend too much time on housework, then my kids go ignored. If I spend too much time with the kids (day in and day out), then the house goes ignored. If I don’t take the time to do some planning ahead, I’m frazzled and don’t know what to do next. I won’t know what’s for dinner, I won’t know what’s next in our lessons. Having my time organized is a must.

But how do I get there? Write it down. Use paper. Use the computer. Use a whiteboard in a central location. Use a binder. Just get it down and follow it.

Planning is the key to time management. We must plan how we are going to spend our time, or it will spend us and we’ll have nothing left at the end of the day (except maybe more work then we started with).

We will take a deeper look into this as we finish up the different realms of managing a household. How will each realm fit in? How do I know how much time I need to spend in each one? This is where our priorities come into play and each household will be different. So, to break it down thus far, consider this:

1. Write down your priorities in order from most important to least

2. Decide how much time to allow each priority (my favorite is 15 minutes at a time)

3. Write down your day, in a general format. Don’t plan too much. You can use a day timer or a sticky note. Just make sure it works for you.

4. Put your priorities in the prime of your day

Keep everything flexible. Use a new sheet everyday to plan out your day. If it turns out you cannot get everything done because the baby was more fussy then usual, that’s okay! The baby comes before a to do list. But knowing that you worked from it and got some things crossed off is still a successful day! Tending to a baby who needs you (or a teachable moment, or an emergency of some kind) is still a successful day!

The goal is to be as attentive as possible.

A few useful hints:

• Have your children work alongside you throughout the day. This gives much opportunity for training, spending time with your children and important relationship building.

• Clean as you go. This saves minutes (which add up to hours) of cleaning later

• When taking breaks, consider reading a book with your child or coloring/drawing with them as a break. Again, this is wonderful relationship building and it certainly doesn’t require much effort to read or color! (No more than it would to read and type on the computer!)

 Next week: Is There Life After Cleaning? Yes!

Want to stay in the loop? Click here.

Head on over to Blissfully Domestic for some more wonderful household tips and time savers!

Here are some questions to help:

• Are there areas of hardness and coldness in my life? What are the roots of these? Do I need to release someone who has hurt me in my past? Do I need to confess and release myself from the bondage of sinful patterns in my own life?
• What are some ways that I can turn the conversation around when other women begin to gripe and complain about their children?
• Name some creative ways we can create warmer, more inviting environments for our children.

I admit, this week’s challenge pierced my heart in a way it really needed. It’s so hard to know where to even start. But I am much like the picture painted in today’s post over At the Well. After my dad moved out, a new man moved into our house and into our lives. I don’t want to get into many details of my childhood because it would dishonor my mom, and she has since apologized and received forgiveness. Plainly put, there was just a lack of relationship building.

Sometimes, I see myself saying the same things my mom said. I don’t like it. I don’t want my childrens’ childhood to be like mine; lacking that relationship. Yet, all too often, I am more bothered by their needs. And why? What is the root of this irritation? It’s simple. My own selfishness. It’s been something I’ve battled with for years…and something I may battle with for many more. The question is, how hard will the fight continue to be?

If I keep fighting, the fight won’t be as often or as hard. If I continue to give in, the fight will be much more often. In fact, it may stop being a fight and be a welcome {if I don’t fight}.

What am I fighting against? Everything else. Everything that wants to steal my attention away. My biggest distraction? The Internet. Not writing, like this. But browsing. There are so many things to browse out there, sometimes I just don’t know when to stop.  My goal has been to stay away from the computer for hours at a time. Some days this works really well…other days, not so well.

Even then, sometimes I carry this attitude of being bothered when my children need something. It’s weird, because I know this is my calling and this is why I was created. I don’t know [other then sin nature] why I fight it sometimes. It really comes down to dying to self. We are called by God to deny ourselves.

Luke 9:23 (New International Version)

 

 ²³Then he said to them all: “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.

I’ve read a wonderful book which addresses this issue [of being bothered] in detail called “Passionate Housewives Desperate for God”. Click here to read my review. I highly recommend it.  In fact, I think it may be in order for me to read again, for some refreshing, reminders, and encouragement.

I try to remember: Motherhood was not meant to be easy, so why try to make it that way? It is a constant denial of myself and what I want in order to be there for a higher purpose: raising Godly children who fear and love Him.

Visit At the Well for more testimonies and to read the terrific article for this week.

This, meaning this blog leads you down paths of my life. What I write shows my passions. Writing itself is a passion, although sometimes I would rather just write with pen and paper.

I browse blogs a lot and most I come across have obvious passion for Jesus as their Lord and they live to please Him. It is so amazing to see how God uses each woman I’ve come across in such a unique fashion. Many are running small businesses right from their home. How fun to get paid doing what you love! I think, eventually, there is  freelance writing (you know, for pay) for me in the future, but now is not my season. I have little ones who keep me quite busy! But, in the mean time, I like to write for the sake of writing. If anything else, it is very therapeutic.

What this blog will reveal, is that there are many aspects to my life; including my role as help meet, homeschooling, child rearing, home management, healthy living (running, etc.), all wrapped under a foundation of Jesus Christ. Without Him, none of this is possible. He is woven into everything I do and everything I am.

Just like my daily life, I want my blog to have a rhythm to it. More often then not, I find myself wanting to write about a topic that I cannot seem to squeeze into the week!  That’s why, often, I have several posts in one day. What I would like to do, is get a rhythm going of posting a certain topic on a certain day. So every day of the week there would be my thoughts on a different topic. For example: Mondays are my favorite meme. I cannot give that up! LOL I take part in the “Motivate Me Monday’s” over at Like a Warm Cup of Coffee.  It’s a wonderful way to begin my week. It’s encouraging and motivating. So, that will stay put.

Tuesdays, I will probably write about things dealing with home management. I’ve already started a series on it and will continue to post those on Tuesdays. The series is a very broad look at home management, but it is broken down into the different aspects.

Wednesday’s were deemed as “Worship Wednesday”, my own little personal “meme”, but I’m ashamed to say I’ve run out of things to talk about. I defined what worship is and that’s pretty much it. Worship is more of an act toward God rather then something that can be exhausted as a topic. So I will replace that with something new. Maybe homeschooling or child rearing.

But you get the idea…each day will focus on some different aspect of my life that I’m learning or want to share. If I feel like I don’t have anything to share that week, I can do one of my favorite meme’s.

So, join me on this journey!

Prompt/Theme for Friday, February 20, 2009

Share your favorite “married moment” from the past couple of weeks. Anything that was special, made you smile, or made you feel all “warm and fuzzy”

My favorite “married moment” huh? I wish it were easier to come up with, but sometimes finding those married moments are hard with 4 children. He did surprise me with chocolates for Valentine’s Day, but I’d rather share something that is more “everyday life” for us. He is a sweetie, though, surprising me like that! I just love him to pieces!

Okay, married moment: Last night was a good married moment. My husband would take nothing less then us snuggling on the couch together, while watching a movie. It’s been a very busy passed two weeks. Between him working longer hours [last week] and our son being in the hospital [this week], we’ve barely had time to connect. BUT, last night was quite nice! After being apart for two full nights (with him sleeping at the hospital and me at home), it was sweet enough for me just to sleep in the same bed together!

One major thing I noticed when I slept in the bed alone was it was COLD! One of the.best.things about being married is being able to sleep in the same bed. Seriously.

Want to share how your husband rocks? Visit Katy Lin at The Great Adventure.

Happy Friday!

Trials and Temptations

 ²Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. ⁴Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. ⁵If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

As my husband and I were going through yet another trial with our son’s health, I asked myself, “Why are you surprised? This life is not meant to be easy and trial free. Why do I expect that it will?”

Even the Bible tells us not to be surprised, but to have joy when they do come! And why? Because it produces godly character in us. Sure, I’ve read this verse before…over and over again. Every time I’ve faced a trial. But I’ve never used it to prepare me before the trial.

Reading the Bible should not be something on a to do list to accomplish just to say it got done. It’s not supposed to be a mundane and daunting task based upon obligation to be a “good Christian”. Reading the Bible everyday equips us to face trials head on, armed and ready. Reading through the Bible in a year is great…it’s a great discipline to be in the Word everyday. But I don’t want to stop there.

I don’t want to narrow it down to random readings alone. I want, no, I need to be digging in it most days for answers to my questions, weapons for warfare, encouragment for others and instruction for daily living. I need to know the Word to spot false teachers, to defend the Truth, and to prepare for the end of the age, whenever that is. And that is the point. I don’t know when it is, but I know I am to be ready.

The next time a trial comes, I want to be ready for it, not surprised by it. Because it shouldn’t suprise me. It should be expected.

What are our weapons of warfare? Reading God’s Word (this cannot be emphasized enough), prayer…warfare and intersessory prayer. Trevailing prayer.

Let’s get ready for the next fight.